My word of the year for this year was “Refinement.” My intention was to focus on what was working in my life to refine my resources and rituals. This year has felt like a balancing act. I am balancing motherhood and a leadership role, both of which require a lot of energy and time spent caretaking. I think the hardest thing to find time for has been meeting my foundational needs, mostly my physical ones. I preach this all day long yet I struggle to implement it in my own life. Why is it that we as women are so keen on meeting others’ needs but resistant to making ourselves a priority? (I have to admit that by writing this line I had a little bit of a Carrie Bradshaw moment…)
I don’t want what I’m doing to be my existence. If worth and identity are all wrapped up in what you are doing, you will never feel like enough. There are always things to be done so this is a dangerous cycle to find yourself in.
Although it is my focus for this year, I am finding there is much to refine in my life. In order to refine a life and distill it into values-led action, I will need to say no to a lot of things. I will need to continue insulating myself with the things that matter rather than bullshit that creeps into our atmosphere day to day. I will need to break old patterns and habits that no longer serve me. This is the most fearful part of the process I have found.
There is so much work to be done and yet so much grace to be cultivated for myself. Maybe all of my intention-settings words should be formed into “ing” words to denote process rather than product. “Refining” may be a better word for this year as it speaks to finding myself in the process of revisions over time.
I am refining,
KAT